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Letter From the Editor

Greetings dear reader. My name is Stephen Ausburne and I am the official Culture Voice figurehead known as the Editor in Chief. It is my extreme, borderline erotic, pleasure to welcome you to the re-release of the cultural phenomenon that is our webzine. If you are a returning reader/fanatic, then you will be pleased to know that all your favorite articles from yesteryear are still available through the archives[1]. Don’t let the new look intimidate you, the site has experienced an upgrade – think Culture Voice 2.0 – and like any good upgrade, your favorite parts are still there, only improved. In other words, completely different than any Microsoft[2] software upgrades.

The sports section has been replaced by a pop culture heading. This isn’t to say that there won’t be any sports articles; they will be included under the umbrella of pop culture. We debated creating separate pages entitled “scatological humor” and “fetishes” but we decided to allocate articles that fit those categories into “politics&power” and “religion” respectively.

By now you have probably noticed that there are names missing from our regulars list as well as the inclusion of some new ones. I encourage you to browse the profiles of all our contributors as, in addition to some fresh literary meat[3], there have been some changes that I’m sure you will find edifying, fascinating, humorous, or some combination thereof. So, to the loyal followers I say welcome back and you can now end your hunger strike; we are officially reopened for business.

For all you newcomers, my inclination is to lock you out until you can explain to me what could have been so damned important that you have avoided us for so long. Alas, I realize that there are myriad circumstances that could prevent an individual from drinking in our weekly issues. Perhaps you just only now purchased a computer[4]. Perhaps you have recently been released from prison[5]. Perhaps you have just woken up from a coma a la Steven Segal in Hard to Kill and in addition to avenging the murder of your wife, battling corrupt politicians, and shtuping Kelly LeBrock[6] you have decided to surf the net. Regardless of your rationale, we are glad to have you and hopefully you will find something to your liking. Chances are good that you will as we offer a veritable cornucopia of written deliciousness. Throughout the coming editions you will find poetry, politics, media reviews, personal essays, short fiction, dirty limericks, blue diamonds, green clovers, yellow moons, and purple horseshoes[7].

I feel I have gone on a bit long, and I do not wish to keep you from frolicking in our virtual fields of urbanity and witticisms. I do want to remind you that we are reaching out to you the reader to offer up any written work for future publication. You can send them to writefor@culture-voice.com and we will consider publishing them or snickering at your syntax.

There is still more for me to say in regard to the Culture Voice reboot, but in respect to your anxiousness to get on with engorging yourself on the new articles, I have implemented a Choose Your Own Adventure option to this letter.

If you wish to return to the home page, click here.

If you wish to read more from the Editor, click here.

If you wish to go into the cave, click here.

[1] You may be wondering what the hell we will write about now that Obama has been elected president. In short, there is a reelection to prepare for in 2012.

[2] No longer a sponsor.

[3] Mmmm…cuttlefish.

[4] Excommunicated from your Amish community perhaps.

[5] Special shout out to our Gitmo fans - holla at your boy.

[6] Don’t hate her because she’s beautiful.

[7] Product placement is new this year - selling out for your reading pleasure. By Mennen.