Things You Might Like To Know About Me:
by Stephen Ausburne
I don’t like maple syrup.
Try as I might, the hula hoop is a device that confounds me.
I hate popcorn.
When I dream about snakes, it usually means that the next day, something will happen.
I often second guess myself when I poop, I wonder if I’m doing it differently than everyone else.
If I had the power to breathe underwater I still wouldn't spend much time in the sea due to the fact that I don't like to get my socks wet.
If I only had 24 hours to live, I'd still probably sleep in.
I fake laugh more than I really laugh. Not that I don’t think things are funny, I’m just not much of a laugher, though I wish I was.
I use lotion.
I am completely lost when it comes to wrapping presents.
I feel like I should like Pearl Jam, but I just don’t.
I feel childish when I use an umbrella.
I think it is really, really funny when someone falls. Even if they are really hurt. It’s one of the rare times that I genuinely laugh. Schadenfreude is my muse.
I have over 14 pairs of shoes.
I can’t drive a stick shift.
When I experience low blood sugar I become cantankerous. Conversely, when I experience high blood sugar I sing show tunes.
I don't think that dreaming about having sex with other men means I'm gay, but daydreaming about it might.